seethingheathen | George Carlin makes me pee.

That's my new thing. Everything makes me pee.

Why, exactly, does George Carlin make me pee? I shall explain.

I finally got around to getting Brain Droppings, and I've only read the first few pages, but I found something about writing that I thought was funny. It reminded me of shite!fic authors.

I've also grown weary of reading about clouds in a book. Doesn't this piss you off? You're reading a nice story, and suddenly the writer has to stop and describe the clouds. Who cares? I'll bet you anything I can write a decent novel with a good, entertaining story, and never once mention the clouds. Really! Every book you read, if there's an outdoor scene, an open window, or even an door slightly ajar, the writer has to say, 'As Bo and Velma walked along the shore, the clouds hung ponderously on the horizon like steel-gray, loosley formed gorilla turds.' I'm not interested. Skip the clouds and get to the fucking. The only story I know of where clouds were important was Noah's Ark.

Reprinted without permission from Brain Droppings, by George Carlin. ©1997.

I've always been a fan of his, but I've not read either of his books. I love when stand-up comedians write books. I've read Seinfeld's and one of Ellen DeGeneres'.

Also, I went in for my job interview this afternoon, and when I got there I was told, "Oh, we tried to ring you and reschedule for Saturday." I must have been in the shower when the phone rang, cos I sure as shit did not hear it.

And I was dressed nice and everything. Bint.

FuckCount: 1