Ficlet.

Title: Lipstick.
Author: limeysugar
Feedback: Please.
Pairing: DomOrli.
Rating: NC-17.
Disclaimers: Not true. . .blah, blah, blah.
Summary: It was in Orlando's bathroom drawer.
A/N: Written cos today (8 December) is Dominic Monaghan's birthday.

(  The first time Dominic saw the lipstick in Orlando's bathroom drawer (nevermind that he was just being nosy and had no right to be looking), he chuckled to himself and let it go. )

Well.

To vestalvagrant, aka Carrot Cake: I replied to both the cleavage email and the arrival date email. Fucking Yahell.

And, um. . . I just read the most disturbing Billijah ever. Ever. I won't link it or say the name of it, but it made me feel icky after having read it. That rarely happens. Just something about it. I think the Billy was a bit too much of an arse for my tastes.

I notice I've been doing alot of reading fics and not commenting on them if I don't like them. I can't bring myself to give a negative review to a non-Mary Sue, so I just don't say anything. What am I going to say? Excuse me, but I think your characterisation of Billy really sucked my arse. . .

Anywho.
Happy Birthday, Mr Monaghan! Happy birthday to you!


You are Crazy Princess Dom!
You like feather boas, 'princess' shirts, tight
pants, and shocking people. You've been known
to call other boys sexy and lick them as well.
(Scandalous!) Embrace your inner queen, honey.


Which Dominic Monaghan are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Snow.

Yeah, so it's snowing like a motherfucker. Okay, not like a motherfucker, but it's kind of snowing. Okay, it's more like a frost than an actual snow. Satisfied, you fucking wankers?

In honour of Dom's birthday, I am wearing my Lijah!Ramones tee over my pink top with my spiffingest pink and blue tie and torn up jeans. Throw in a few bracelets and wrist cuffs, and I'm set to go. Cos I am going out here in a bit. Yes, on a week-day. Feh.

I got invited to this bloke's flat to watch TTT-EE on his. . .projector screen tv thinger. It's bloody brilliant. Like a fucking cinema, it is. He won't appreciate the slash though, so I doubt I'll take advantage. It won't be right watching the pretty gay boys play on the screen with a straight man who potentially expects to get laid. Not right at all!

EDIT: I realised, after re-reading this, that it seems as though I meant that the boys were playing with a straight man who potentially expected to get laid. What I clearly meant was that the straight man with whom I was watching said film would want some of Teh Limey Sugah. So, yeah. Heh.

Ho. Ho. Ho.

Nicked from skyeathena. Cos I'm not going out afterall. It's really snowing now.

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.

It really wasn't my fault what happened at Veevs's Christmas party. It was Carisa who spiked the punch with too much Drambuie. I can't help it if I drank 18 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like lavender.

I thought it was funny when I put Veevs's knickers on my head and danced the Electric Slide on the chair while singing `I Will Lick Your Arsehole'. I didn't mean to break Veevs's electric toothbrush and don't know why Veevs would sue me for GBH.

I don't remember calling Jonathan's wife a flat goat---even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and orange lipstick!

And when I threw up on Nicole's husband's foot, it was only because I ate too much of that cheese.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my BMW through my neighbor's lounge. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a rusty koala and have me arrested for homicide!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all hard and lush. And I'm really not to blame for any of this drunk stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and fastidiously yours,
Sonsy (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It's only 17 bucks!

Find the link on her site, cos I can't be arsed.

What the fuck EVER.

Okay. Yeah. All of a sudden I'm in a really shite mood. And I don't know why! No, I'm not on my fucking period, thanks. Maybe it's the weather. My throat hurts, so I'm sucking on Halls. I can't find Blackcurrant. Found black cherry, but it's shite, so now I've got strawberry. Or strawwwrburrie-uh. And I think I'm thirsty. Maybe I have to pee. I don't know! Argh!