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seethingheathen
WARNING: Contains adult language. Now that he's left Uni, what awaits Derek Walker? True love? Grilled cheese? True love of grilled cheese? Dial-up users, please note that there are ~fifty 600x400 images behind the cut. |
 After leaving Academie le Tour, Derek moved to Barclay. I only gave him the §5000 he had saved from his scholarship money and I moved him into this block of flats. Seriously, who leaves uni and buys a big plot of land to build a house on? A flat would be more realistic, and would lend itself to finding neighbours to potentially mate with. Ahahaha.  This is what the flat looked like before I sent Derek off to the charity shop to buy some cheap furniture. It's small, but he's a bachelor still, so he doesn't need all that much room. When the babies start coming, we'll see about an upgrade.  I see he has as much taste in furniture as he does in bed partners. Though he did splash out on a flat-screen.  The interior may not be much, but there is a nice view.  Now that we've gotten the living space taken care of, it's time to give ol' Derek a shiny new look. Sometimes I think that EAxis is staffed with wizards who have no idea how Muggles dress. This has got to be one of the worst age-up outfits I've had the displeasure of being saddled with.  Yeah, I'd hit it. I love me some ginger.  Since he's only got §117 after paying rent and buying furniture (I took pity on him and gave him free clothes), it's time to find a job. Luckily for him, there was an opening in the Adventure track for a Multi-Regional Sim of Some Question. He can start on his way to Space Piracy straight away.  All that shopping and grooming had Derek in hunger desperation, but as soon as he got his sandwich made, the carpool arrived. Blast!  Whilst our intrepid hero was away at work, Rod Humble paid him a visit. Guess what was sold immediately...  He wasn't in the door five minutes, and Alice phoned to ask him out. Perhaps there is hope for this gene pool after all.  Or not. Derek somehow felt it necessary to tell Alice that he still has the hots for the maid. Smooth move, Ex-Lax.  Still feeling a bit put out by the fact that Derek wants to bone the help, Alice brought her friend Sarah along. Apparently, Derek and Sarah are of the opinion that Alice's liver would be lovely with fava beans and a nice chianti.  Derek: Pork chops for me, filet mignon for the lady, and spaghetti for the gooseberry. Derek: Cock-blockers get spaghetti.  Alice: I need a beer.  Cock-Blocker: I thought you quit drinking after you put your car through the front of that Asda.  As the ladies discussed Alice's booze issues, Derek contemplated which one he wanted to bring home. Alice?  Or Sarah? They both sort of have the same facial structure. Sarah's a Sim I made a awhile ago and forgot about. Now she's back to punish me, I know it.  Give up the dream, Sarah.  Derek: So I herd u liek grilled cheese.  Alice: I'm lactose-intolerant, you insensitive bastard!  I thought that after Derek brought both women home, they would get bored and leave. I was a bit surprised when Alice grabbed him. I had him say good-bye to Sarah and ask Alice to spend the night.  Being the gentleman he is, Derek went straight to bed. Alone.  Alice spent hours just staring out the window and not moving.  As soon as he woke up, she autonomously gave him a back rub. Score. He asked her to move in, and she accepted. Double score!  Alice brought a paltry §744 and this stereo thing. Alice Cooper Popularity / No Secondary LTW: Become Media Magnate Current Occupation: Paralegal Skills: All Maxed Neat - 6 Shy/Outgoing - 5 Active - 8 Serious - 3 Grouchy - 3  Since he's no longer a bachelor, Derek has to clean the place up a bit. Actually, he's always cleaning, but it was a nice filler shot.  He's a neat guy, what can I say?  I didn't give Alice much of a make-over. I just changed her hair and clothes. After this, I sold the stereo. I hate when Sims leave it on all day. :(  They don't even cuddle when they sleep. How sad. In fact, they haven't had one single romantic interaction since the back rub. Yes, their relationship is hovering lamely in The Friend Zone.  Even though her energy bar was dark orange, Alice got up in the middle of the night and started painting. Is sharing a bed with Derek that repulsive? Does he fart? Perhaps he kicked her out of bed because SHE HAS NO BUTT. She's the female lead in the Barclay Theatre Group's production of No Ass Alice.  Don't get stroppy with me, missy. I didn't force you out of bed.  Derek had the next day off, so to ease his frustration and his Carpal Tunnel, he rang the maid for a booty call.  Ooh... sick burn!  That's okay, though. He got a promotion the next day, and that helped ease the pain of rejection.  Sod paying rent! That extra money's going toward an exercise bike! And a new work-out outfit.  Derek: Oi, postbox! Bow before my awesome manliness!  Perhaps feeling a bit  After being forced to change out of that fuck-ugly football kit, Derek ran back outside to greet the interloper. Derek: I love grilled cheese! I can eat it every day! I'd bathe in it, but last time I tried that I got hot, melted cheese stuck in crevices I didn't know I had.  Stud Muffin: Yeah, grilled cheese is awesome. You know what's even more awesome? Derek: More grilled cheese?  Stud Muffin: And this is why I'm going to steal your girlfriend. Loser. Are you just going to stand there and take that?  Derek: Hell, no. I'm going to seethe angrily at them from the exercise bike. Oh, Jesus. And I had such high hopes for you.  Oh. Okay.  And it's a TV. Which I sold for rent money.  I don't think Stud Muffin liked that too well. He didn't even finish his lunch.  Derek, seeing that Alice's evening plans had been ruined, decided that now would be a good time to have his portrait painted. Alice: Don't you want to wait until we have a house with nice wallpaper? I mean, that kitchen is dreadful. Derek: It's perfect! It shows I come from humble beginnings!  Derek: Hrm. Something's missing. Aha! I know what this portrait needs!  Derek: MOAR GRILLED CHEESE!  Alice: What have I gotten myself into? Will Derek and Alice ever woo-hoo? Will Alice run screaming for the hills? Your guess is as good as mine. [CONTINUED HERE] |
